Everyone else so perfect,
Suffering and hate, dazing me,
I want to escape,
Let me be free!
I need to run!
I need to hide!
Leave me alone!
Let me decide!
I need to scream!
I need to shout!
I need to let my anger out…
Homeless
I sit here strayed, all alone,
Only memories of having a home,
A coat is all to comfort me,
I huddle alone, beneath this tree.
Nowhere to stay, I need to hide,
All my fears bunched up inside,
The sun is shining but it rains on me,
At least now, my decisions are free.
But what is there that I can decide?
Where to run, where to hide?
If they spy me they will take me back,
To the home, I now lack.
But why did I go, why did I leave?
The rows, the fighting, I did truly believe,
I'd be better off on my own,
But only now do I know,
I'm all alone. . .
The cold, hard hit of betrayal,
Stolen away, the happy days,
Time flies past me,
The world now a tear-filled haze.
Arrogance, conceit, insensitivity,
Selfish behaviour, what does it achieve?
The perfect world crowding in,
Suffocating, I cannot breathe.
Save me from the temptation,
Help me live my life,
Change me, shape me,
Make me normal, free from strife.
I wear the smile,
I show the grin,
Yet the pain,
Creeps slowly in…
Force open my eyes,
Another day of pain,
Climb out of bed,
Play the charade again.
Stumble to school,
Put on the smile,
Keep faking it,
If only for a while.
Like a puppet,
Do as I'm told,
Tears escaping, even so,
The act growing old.
Complete the work,
To home I walk,
Those beady eyes,
Watching like a hawk.
My world so suffocated,
Everything they follow,
Making sure I copy them,
Into depression, I now wallow.
My toothless grin a-smiling,
As dawn danced on the hills,
My heart pounding ever quicker,
Full of excitement and thrills.
A warm blush of happiness,
Shining from within me,
I played with my teddy bear,
And let my imagination free.
When you enter the debris of a neat suburban home
Avert your eyes onto the pine and chrome
Don't look at the shards of shiny happy guys
Because you may see your reflection in their eyes
Your blank eyes and scarred wrists
In you their hopelessness also exists.
Do you feel their suppression?
Taste that bitter sweet depression
You're just like them, you feel the loss
The black sheep's gone but at what cost?
There is no friction but there is neither a spark
The future seems empty and stark.
That argument seems so pointless now
You pushed her over the edge, Mum, take a bow
Responsible, you say, you are not,
Is that why you wake, scr
Slap crunch -
it was just me, nose diving into pavement cracks
before the three women in aprons and designer shoes
+ a push chair
laughed me off the back street.
They hold their futures in the backs of their heavy thighs.
Breath harder -
Four years ago I was sixteen, three blond haired girls
called me 'slag' in the bus station at seven oh ten PM.
They liked cigarettes and skipping school, I didn't
like running
But I had to. Scream louder -
I wanted to tell some of these people to watch the sun-clipse
and understand love is a cheesy kind of asthma
with a lower survival rate, it has a faucet that won't turn off
even if you c
I saved it up in an iron clad box
because, its better
when "I love you" rings out like
"Fuck" during midnight mass
and tastes like the salt
on a margarita glass
(contrast)
if the movies tell you otherwise
they lied.
I guess
when you spend your whole life listening
to soundtracks
of lives that never existed, you end
up with skewed expectations
of life love sex
& depressions.
The rest is left
out, or lost in the mix.
actions never speak to me but
they do yell metaphors
at the top of their god-damn lungs.
is that why, when
you walk
into a room
I hear something about diamonds?
Star light, star bright.
Wish I may, wish I might.
Have the wish I wish tonight.
I wish my tears would cease to fall.
I wish I was not so dismal.
I wish that I could end it all.
If only Death would answer my call.
I wish that someone would just understand.
I wish I did not have this pain to withstand.
Happiness is in high demand.
Is this the life that God had planned?
I wish my pain would meet an end.
I wish I no longer had to pretend.
One day to smile, I intend.
My broken soul, itself will mend.
I wish my blackened tears would dry.
I wish with society I could comply.
Sometimes it is easier than life to die.
So perhaps this
There was once a troubled girl
Who was pretty, was slim, was fair.
But no one ever told her this
As no one would ever care.
She took refuge in her lonely room,
And removed her disguise,
Her smile was just an act,
And her happiness all lies.
She didn't want attention,
The fuss she would despise
She just wanted to live alone
In her own paradise.
Almost every day she left for school
The lessons were a distraction.
She didn't answer to the name-calling
She wouldn't give them the satisfaction.
Yet all of the words span in her head,
And echoed in her mind
She just wanted to forget them all
And leave the sorrow behind.
So now she
Current Residence: Mars Favourite genre of music: Nearly all genres of rock. Favourite style of art: Emotive portraits, unusual concepts, art with a meaning. Shell of choice: A snail one please...? Skin of choice: My own, human is more comfortable than alien :p Favourite cartoon character: Ariel, The Little Mermaid :) Personal Quote: "Can I stroke you...?"
Favourite Visual Artist
I don't have a particular one, I just like individual pieces of art. :)
I've spent a lot of time away from deviantArt and have realised that I need to improve my writing a lot more. Therefore, I have decided to delete all of my poems from this account, in hope to improve them and get more published.
Thus, I was just letting you all know that in the course of the next week I will be emptying my gallery.
Thank you all so much for all the support you have given me since I have joined, helping me to grow in my writing and myself.
I'll miss your comments very much, but hopefully I'll start a new account with photography in it that you can critique!
Anyway, thank you for all of your support, I appreciate it very mu
Sorry. Haven't updated in forever.
Rawerj;rgoj.
The biggest thing to happen to me recently was on Friday. I had an interview with the modelling agency that told me they were interested in me, and they really liked me. So they took my measurements and filled in an application form. Then I had a shoot with them to get some standard pictures for my portfolio (we have to get a proper one later), and they're sending them in the post tomorrow as well as my contract. I'm a proper model. You don't know how long I've waited to do this. It's just ohjfgiohoihij:D:D:DI'MAMODEL!
The lady who was taking my interview was really lovely as well, giving me
Sorry. Haven't updated in forever.
Rawerj;rgoj.
The biggest thing to happen to me recently was on Friday. I had an interview with the modelling agency that told me they were interested in me, and they really liked me. So they took my measurements and filled in an application form. Then I had a shoot with them to get some standard pictures for my portfolio (we have to get a proper one later), and they're sending them in the post tomorrow as well as my contract. I'm a proper model. You don't know how long I've waited to do this. It's just ohjfgiohoihij:D:D:DI'MAMODEL!
The lady who was taking my interview was really lovely as well, giving me